Is there room for a chair more?

[Painter]

Hi Zues, good to see you around! I read your long post and enjoyed hearing about how happy you are and how you share your passions with your kids. I notice how you focus on the things that are good, rather than complain about any disadvantages. I think you know the secret of attitude.

I'm doing quite well with the D. Of course it's not what I wanted, and a moment of silence is exactly what I'm taking time for. I still have dreams of revisiting my home and finding OW there, but it feels like closure at this point, not upset or uncertainty. In my last dream, I told her that nothing was different there except a change of personell. Then I waved dismissively and walked away. It's been enough time and very little contact (just money/business) to create a real distance. I'm really better off and much, much happier now than I was in my M.

I haven't shared a lot about what's going on in my life for privacy/legal reasons. That's less problematic now. I have spent the last year pursuing my interests and passions (painting and singing), and spending time with friends, my son and my pets - besides working parttime from home and figuring out my future path. It's a nice life and I feel very lucky and fulfilled. I enjoy the vibrant and friendly city I live in, everything is within easy reach, and there's so much going on that I like to participate in.

Tomorrow I start a fulltime job - it's time to get back to reality, and I need to get a place of my own. I hope to keep my interests as a big part of my life, but financial freedom is crucial to building a future for myself. I'm excited about the job, I have lots of experience in the field and I feel comfortable with the tasks, but it will also be challenging enough to hold my interest. It's also a 5 minute commute and well paid, so can't really complain about anything!

I have met someone special and we've been seeing each other for a while now. It's been really great, but also bumpy at times, even painful, but he is very committed and we've worked through some of our issues. We're working on the rest to see if this will be the lasting R we both wish for. He went through a D a few years ago and has been very supportive of my process.

We're a good match. I've learned a lot about what I need in a R to thrive emotionally, and I didn't get much of that in my M (our MC called it 'a desert'). Quality time is extremely important to me. I'm very independent and capable of making my own decisions, and I need quite a bit of alone time, but within a R I need a lot of emotional connection and much prefer doing things together than by myself. We're very, very similar in many ways. Sometimes that can be a challenge when both are pretty certain of themselves, or have messy baggage. But it's the most balanced and even R I've been in, I think. It's exciting to find someone who gets me and who I can really respect. I highly recommend it.

So at this point, my life feels quite complete. I can't think of anything I would want differently. If my new R doesn't last, I will still be fine. There are advantages to being single, and I would honestly have preferred to be alone a bit longer - but we can't always choose when something special comes by.