25yearsmlc 10 yrs later I File D (part 4)

[25yearsmlc]

thanks guys (KML, Dale, particularly)

So as a general underlying assumption (knowing I'm going to see a financial planner for this anyhow)

figure out what the spousal support would be for 5+ years, AND factor in that I'd pay taxes on that as income

and h would get to deduct it (though he's a doctor he is SO pain avoidant that he will tune out about money issues like tax consequences. This was my arena but my focus was on a good return on investments, not divorce...H will get glazed furious eyes and wait for the "authority figure" to tell him which number is higher)

ANYHOW that ^^rant is over...

so I add up whatever lump sum he'd offer AND then factor in the tax consequences (I heard the financial person say the 401k was treated differently for those under 59 in a divorce, from other IRA's)

I'd roll it over until I know what the heck I'm going to do or where to live. Am I missing something there? I like the stock market and have done well there, but I'd prefer it outside of a retirement account for reasons you guys can figure out.


I'd still get a pension too, but that is taxed also. (If h thinks I will waive the pension share, he's mistaken. I am entitled to that by law, not HIM. He does have to "agree" but I will not give that up. It's a "free" annuity and there's no amount in the retirement account that will make up for that) - unless h has been hiding money super well OR unless his dad gives him some of his expected inheritance early -which btw, he did for h's brother. Hmmm, now that i think of it...that may be how h is pretending to have retired...ANYHOW

IF NOT for rent or a mortgage in this pricey area, I'd be fine on the pension alone, and whatever I earn would be gravy.

The retirement accounts would be my next egg. Oh but lest we forget, half that retirement is mine anyhow, I will bet you both some Gin & Tonics or the drinks of your choice, that h "Forgets" that half is mine anyhow. Yep that thought just occurred to me and it's safe to assume he somehow did not compute that.

i'm telling you that when it comes to money he is very weird and fear based.

SO I can either make all my loved ones move to a cheaper real estate area, or - or I don't know.

Live cheaply but have fun, overseas for awhile - and come back when I'm ready to settle somewhere,

AND OR buy some investment properties with positive cash flows in much cheaper areas I'm familiar with and in which I could live if pressed b/c I like them (e.g. San Antonio - a place we were stationed and still have friends in)
It is a place I could live even though I have no family there. Very affordable and I like drier climates.

At some point - 65?? Do we all try to live near our grandkids or siblings?

Where's the manual on this???

Lots to figure out.