Confused As Hell

[cdubbs]

Next on the personal development list ->... I always wanted to delve deeper into mindfulness and meditation. One of my big issues is being present. I am in my head a lot, whether it be going over some to do list, thinking about what needs to be done, thinking of what I already did, etc. Probably Bipolar related because when I went of my meds it really picks up and makes it hard to communicate effectively. I'll be reading the book in conjunction with doing guided meditations.

Goal: I will meditate for at least 15 minutes everyday for 8 weeks.

Expected Outcome: Greater capacity to live in the present, moment to moment and take steps to achieve inner peace.

Relationship Front

Has been fairly tame and cordial since the meeting to get legally separated. I think I have been doing a better job of detaching. If I do something for her, I no longer have been looking for any acknowledgement, good or bad. We still talk multiple times a day, but I have not been initiating unless it is related to the kids or appointments. We still make each other laugh and i am still the person she calls first with any questions or if she has news to share.

I try not to read into anything and continue of my self improvement journey. Its been hard to GAL with the kids and getting the house ready for sale. I'm thinking of going skydiving. I have a huge fear of heights and I'm not really a fan of planes. One of my pillars of improvement has been living with and accepting fear. I do not want to be controlled by fear. What better way than to freefall from a plane in the sky, right?

Busy weekend lined up. Not sure if I'll be able to post. I want to wish a Happy Father's Day to everybody. Hope you have a great one.