25yearsmlc 10 yrs later I File D (part 4)

[Gordie]

25,

Super sad story. We'll never know of course but let me dissent and say maybe not mental illness. After b d, I never thought of hurting my w but I thought a lot about running away or killing myself which is just another form of escape. On the outside, no one knew this. I did well at work, upheld all of my social responsibilities with family and friends...yet inside, I was in the darkest place I'd ever been. I could not sleep. When I couldn't take it anymore, I finally told a friend and that was the road to self recovery for me, but it was very dark for about three months.