Her MLC: The Battle I Didn't Choose

[Brubeck]

I splurged within one week and went to see 3 bands that I love for the first time. My closest friend E.D. came with for the third band. We had a great time. I just discovered yesterday that the CSO will be playing the entire score to Jaws at the end of this month. Jaws is my favorite film of all time. I scored a first row balcony seat for $50. I'm stoked.

Thank you 25yearsmlc, Gordie, Georgiabelle, peacetoday for the good wishes regarding my job hunt. I appreciate it. Unemployment was OK for a very short while, but being unemployed just feels like having another weekend day, but without my sons around.

9th job interview tomorrow. I've had 2 phone screenings with this company. The 2nd screening was with the person I would report to directly, so I was approved by him over the phone. I'm told I will be meeting the Operations Director, the staff, and take a tour of the facility.

I pray to God I get this. I'm getting nervous. My unemployment ends in 2 months. I have to take whatever I can get if I don't get a job by then. "It's always darkest before dawn", I'm told. I sure hope so. I am praying.

Dealing with unemployment and being a LBS is a serious blow to one's self-esteem. Sometimes it feels like the only affirmation I have is how much my sons trust me.

I read a lot of old threads and archives over the weekend. One recurring message from both LBS' and surviving MLCers was to not try and make sense of any of this. You cannot make out what's inside their head (they may not either) and you wouldn't want to anyhow. Stay away. Lay low. STFU smoothie as much as I can.

I avoid W at all costs and do everything possible to keep the boys out of her hair. When she does speak with me, she projects anger and/or annoyance with every sentence. Her face and voice always wear the blazing hot feeling of F**K YOU. She only seems content when she says she's leaving the house to go somewhere.

When she's forced to deal with the kids, or if I make a mistake somewhere regarding household stuff, I get spewing - Please do us both a favor and finish this divorce. I see no reason why I should pretend you are not here and parent all by myself. I'm still doing way more around here than her, what is she talking about?

I guess this is what gaslighting is, even if it's unintentional. The MLCer creates a crazy situation and inhabits it comfortably. The LBS sees the trainwreck unfolding and how calm the MLCer is about it and it makes them feel crazy.

Indeed, MLC ain't for the weak - even for the bystanders. It's hard to stomach this every day. This is an overflowing bucket of crazy.