Boston Dad in need of Help

[Teppo]

So, we met with our Deacon today and it went as I predicted. She had two typed pages of her grievances that she read off to me. I'm guilty of several things that she mentioned such as my moodiness, anger, irrational worrying, not being nice to her mom. I told her that I acknowledge her hurt and that I'm sorry for the things I've done. But some of her complaints were very petty such as beeping my car in traffic, breaking her laptop (I think I pounded the keyboard in frustration), breaking a dish (an accident), and knocking over a lamp (I don't quite remember this one). Mind you, these events occurred over a 10 year period in which there were many good times. Nonetheless, I wasn't allowed to rebut her points. During all this she made statements such as "I'm done" and "I'm not giving you any hope".

We're going to meet again with our Deacon, who still seems hopeful, but it seems all but over now. In the meantime she continues to see her emotional affair partner. Is this when I detach?