Dealing with (stuck)? MLCer many years later

[elfie]

To make a long story short, 8 years ago, (seems like yesterday), my H announced he was leaving me after he had brought me home from the airport. I was coming back from a trip I had taken visiting our then 17yr-old daughter who was in school away from home. He had pointed at a letter on the couch telling me that he was explaining everything in the letter. And he left. Not far mind you. Just 15 minutes away. He had set up home in his office which was a regular 2-bedroom apartment, which in time he had equipped with everything needed for a comfortable lifestyle. To say I was shocked is an understatement. I did all the wrong things of course, crying, pleading, etc. He would hang up on me, refused to talk, etc.

In the letter there was the script: Unhappy for years, he deserves happiness, he didn't feel appreciated, he loved me but he couldn't live with me, etc. I am not claiming there were no issues in our marriage. There were. But they were the kind that could be overcome with some communication, which we didn't have. Running was his preferred mode of dealing with issues that involved emotional exposure and he has burned a few bridges in his life including the ones with this mother and father.