You can go to a counselor alone but I don't think it makes sense to bring an unwilling partner to counseling. For me it went from "I just want to have it end peacefully" to "I want to do it to help you cope" to "I want to see if it can be saved" and agreeing that "we desperately need outside help".
On the other hand, remember you cannot believe anything they say. That statement might be a test to see if you are serious and committed. I hate this part as it seems like playing games...but perhaps they feel the same about us making changes.
