DonH you are obviously a h*lluva guy, your posts are always so human and insightful. Ginger and Georgiabelle, I'm big fans of yours from comments I've read on other threads.
Something I meant to say to East and didn't, was that in addition to the other comments that have been made, I think if you could have something meaningful with this woman in the future, you are risking that now by becoming involved too quickly and too deeply. If that relationship is "meant to be" it should be something that can be put aside while you do right by your vows and your D.
I dipped into the onling dating pool in January. I quickly learned that I had no place being involved with anyone (I kicked H out in October). As Ginger said, until you can discuss the marriage without emotion (in my case tears, which I could not) then you are not ready to be with anyone.
As I recall your W was starting to come around a bit. Perhaps just a touch and go at realizing that she could lose you, but what happens if things don't work out with GF, and you see how D has been harmed by this, and you regret not working harder to save the marriage. Personally, I want to have no reget. Although I feel done, I am carrying on and abiding by DB and giving my H his space and, without hope (a nod to you Andrew) I am leaving the door ever so slightly ajar.
My experience in January and yours with this GF establishes that there are people out there. You do not have to be alone forever. You can have feelings for someone again. But, it should be with a clean conscience, a clear head, and an open heart. I agree with the others that the problems maintaining your emotions with W spell big time disaster for where you are heading.
