I wanted to come here and thank you so much for your post on my thread. And you are dead on right. I have the most awful habit of blaming myself and beating myself up and looking for what I did wrong. I was lead to believe my divorce was all my fault too. It sticks with you. It haunts you. It is a trigger and something that needs to be unlearned. I can understand how you sat there and thought this divorce was your fault. I am so glad you are finding out it is not. Sure, there are things we could all work on and 180, but sometimes, they are just not our fault. Our spouses unfortunate choices are sometimes at fault, and it's not us who lead them to those choices, they are ones we had no say in.
I know you IRL and you are smart, energetic, beautiful and fun. I understand the war that wages within sometimes. But it doesn't make us who we are. I think the biggest injustice to ourselves would be to deny ourselves happiness and peace. I might be doing that to myself now.
I am glad you restarted counseling. I am going to see my IC tonight. it really helps. And I just happened to be looking into hypnotherapy the other day. My mind spins. My mind will play a situation over and over like a repeated conversation in my head going in every possible direction. I need to learn how to turn it off if not slow it down. it's where my own self torment comes in.
