Some observations, if you don't mind. Just some perspectives. May or may not be true, but just things I know first hand to keep in the back of your mind.
IVF. I went through IVF to have our daughter. I don't think either of us was fully prepared for that. My ex has congenital absence of the vas deferens. The only way we were to conceive is through IVF. He had to have surgery also to remove his sperm. We both had begun new careers when we embarked on this journey. Very stressful. Those hormonal injections. Wow. What he ll. I gained weight, I had hot flashes, I was extremely irritable and I am not an irritable person. The hormones were AWFUL. Everyday I would travel a long distance at one point everyday for daily blood work and ultrasounds. Often after working a 12.5 hours night shift as a nurse in the ICU.
Yes, I am going to say HUGE mistake on the weight comment. Especially in a very vulnerable moment in the shower. But that moment did not end your M. It is good you realized your mistake and apologized from it.
But that IVF. Messes with moods horribly. Pregnancy loss. I am so sorry for your loss. We were fortunate to have IVF to work on the first try, although they thought I was going to lose her in the early weeks. When a woman has to go through these hormones, then suffers loss, parts of her feel inadequate as a woman. I imagine a lot of this is suffering from depression after pregnancy loss.
In this period, time, space, empathy, 180's. All the advice will get you through. I hope to be able to offer some perspective on where she MIGHT be coming from. I can't mind read, I can't speak for her, but having been through the same and knowing other couples who have, it is not uncommon.
