Here again part 6

[sandi2]

Although the baby will be in good hands, it is one of the hardest things for a mother to leave her newborn.

I had written out a lengthy post yesterday, and when I read your last post, I decided to delete mine. I am here in your corner, and I want the best for you and your precious children.

I see you repeating the same actions (relationship talk) and it is not the solution. I use to choose the same way to deal with issues in my MR, and I could see my H shut down when I opened my mouth. I honestly did not know how to work on a M issue without discussing it first. Calmly talking about the issues was the living picture I saw between my parents and grandparents. That was the solution for them, but it just did not work in my own MR. And guess what? I continued doing the same thing and expecting different results!

I think the first advice I started receiving from the board was that I could not change anyone but myself. It was NOT what I wanted to hear! I would bash my H even more, and the board members continued to tell me the same message.

You have a serious problem in your M. You know what you want from your H, and you continue using the same method trying to get your H to give you what you want. ((TO)) I do think you are shooting yourself in the foot every time you approach him to get what you want. He shuts down a little more each time you say something to him about the M.

I see one of three options for you. ( Maybe someone else can offer a better solution). 1) You apply Drop the Rope Technique. 2) You kick him out. 3) You focus on the one person you have power to change, and you stop using the non-solution behavior/actions.