What a weird day... so here is another update.... I went to go see a movie and when I came back W greeted me in tears and said how she doesn't feel anything. Nothing sounds like fun to her. She seemed in major despair so we hugged and we cuddled a bit. She then initiated more physical contact saying that she doesn't want to give me false hope and I said I don't have false hope I know it won't be fixed overnight and she said: maybe ever. And I said. Yes that is possible. She then initiated sex which we did. I know the rules say not to do that but given her despair and given the many mixed signals I figured this may give some kind of positive boost.
She then later came over to my room and said she is conflicted about what happened because she wanted to keep that boundary. But it was HER who initiated (as it was a week ago before I left for a trip...but at that point nothing happened). She said the most likely option is still for this to be over. She said it felt good but different since it lacked that lovey-dovey feeling.
