IF IF IF the WAS has a great awakening down the road, it will Not have hurt our cause to have moved on.
Moving on cannot scare us so much b/c it's not saying we are meeting some new person and remarrying next year. We are just not waiting anymore. We are living our lives fully, happily and we are showing our children how to heal from a blow to our hearts and a setback in life.
The WAS would have to catch up to us to be worth even considering a recon, so why on earth "wait" for that? Plus It's actually more likely to happen if they see a healthy whole individual who brings something to the table, a happy person, a desirable person who might just want to be in a healthy R with a healthy person and that might not be the WAS...
Not to mention the really brave hard work that makes up piecing,
which is far far less likely to happen or to work, if we have been "waiting".
Waiting will make piecing harder, and scarier for us b/c it makes us more fearful of being left again,
b/c we will believe we cannot make it without our spouses, and will sort of just proved that to ourselves b/c we did not GAL when we could have.
Second, Not moving out is USUALLY a form of legal advice. It's to protect property, and sometimes it's to avoid a charge of "abandonment" in child custody issues.
Abandonment does not apply in "no fault only" states, or when there are no kids and each person has to decide about what property is at stake and talk to a L.
If you refuse to move out, for whatever reason, that does not mean you are waiting, although I can see why it is harder to show you are "moving on" if you are in the same house.
Hope this^^ helps.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
