So I just read an article that said that love is a choice...Imagine if love is actually not a choice. Imagine it is an emotion?
I read this earlier today, and Ive been thinking on it for some time to try to get my thoughts a little bit straighter before responding. Im not sure Im there yet, but I will say that Im trying to imagine love as a fleeting emotion, as something that we, as humans, have no control over, and Ive come to the conclusion that I reject that concept.
Fundamentally, I cant come around to the idea that I have no control over who I love. I dont think falling in or out of love is an accident, I think it is a conscious decision that a person makes. I dont think there is such a thing as accidentally falling in or out of love; instead it grows or shrinks based on actions, words, decisions that the people in the relationship make.
You speak above about love and hate, but I dont think they are opposites as you seem to. I believe that you can love and hate someone at the same time. They are both strong ends of a spectrum. As Vapo wrote, I believe indifference or apathy are better choices as the opposite of love. How can you possible love someone and feel indifferent about them? How can you hate someone and feel indifferent about them?
I went through my entire marriage thinking that love was a given. That my love and my ex's love would be present for each other, just because. I dont believe that it just 'goes away' as you are suggesting, but more that it isnt self-sustaining; love needs to be nurtured and making the choice to love is what allows it to thrive.
