I think it's different for everyone in every case. My ex's OW is a lawyer (although we make the same money, I am a nurse) she is very physically unattractive, has no shared interests, is a mess (he is a neat freak and she is a hoarder) but they have been together for 9 years, married 6. She tolerates his abuse where I just couldn't take it anymore and I began to stand up for myself.
Whatever they got apparently works for them. But it didn't work for us.
