I have always read your situation with such heart ache, regarding what those children have had to go through.
I truly do not understand how it is possible that your wife is able to look in the mirror every day. I wonder the same of my ex, but for some reason it feels worse to me when it is a mom. What lies does she have to tell herself daily? I just do not understand and its hard not to judge someone that does not put their children first.
For me, I have chosen to just accept that this is all my ex is capable of offering and I stopped taking it personally. My anger at him for leaving, and for not being a good dad is subsiding. Its just not in him. Instead, I am just so grateful that I am given the opportunity to raise an amazing child the way I like.
My son is actually really cool with the situation. He actually told me he is happy because now when he visits his grandmother, his father takes him out. (My ex did not spend much time with him when we were together) He also was in a "banana splits group" with school and it was really helpful. I also make sure to never allow him to see me angry at his dad. I talk nicely of him but very minimally.
You have been a solid rock for your children. I am glad that things seem to be working out legally in your favor. I am glad that you have stood strong and acted in the children's best interest. You are doing great.
