Is it Midlife Crisis, Walkaway Spouse or the End?

[Sotto]

I haven't read the whole of your sitch, but I would encourage you to work on you - for you - and not worry too much about what she thinks..

If you - I'm just plucking examples here - spent hours playing video games and ignorin your kids - change this because you want a better R with them. Not because you hope she will notice what a great father you are etc..

As time went on, it mattered far less what XH thought about things. And much more that I was creating a good life for myself, given his departure...

Of course, any WAS could then look back and wonder - why have things turned out so well for him/her when my life seems to have crumbled??

Best not to keep looking over your shoulder...have you read No More Mr Nice Guy??