God does for us what we cannot do for ourselves

[Zues126]

But I just want to understand so badly about spouses like ours, that are able to be so emotionally disconnected. I mean, we are talking about spouses that shared our lives with us, had children together, grew up together! I want to understand the psychology behind it. Was it something that I just missed while dating? The drugs?

Very simple. The WAS no longer 'feels' warm fuzzy feelings towards the LBS. They follow their feelings. Sometimes they have the desire to inflict pain in an attempt at revenge for their pain. Sometimes they just want to chase the dragon of a new relationship or something they think is better for them. And unfortunately in today's age we believe in 'following your heart' which can easily be taken to a destructive extreme. So as long as WAH looks at his feelings as his moral compass and he doesn't feel bad behaving badly, he believes it's ok because it doesn't feel bad to him. And if only you had been different he would feel different and wouldn't act how he's acting. Or whatever. This is why I don't like feelings as a compass.