W after dinner asked about the repair to the other house. Asked which numbers I hadn't called that she would be able to chase up. I said some of them are not willing to give a quote. Then it turned into ok will need to change the bed to a bunk bed for the girls. I said I don't want you to leave.
A long relationship talk started. Not too many accusations but couldn't really find a way out or to avoid. She said that I can't avoid it anymore and if I didn't co-operate it would get ugly and that she would need to blame me for something to get the divorce happen.
I repeated twice that for the happiness of the D's we need to learn to get along. And them she said oh you mean I would be able to bring my lover that way of getting along.
At a point one of the Ds heard us and came down. She was extremely worried. She knew the tension. But the waited for us to finish at bed.
She said she wanted a happy life with her and the girls and that she doesn't want to be with me.
I didn't reveal any of the lies I know about the time she was with OM. But came very close. Though told her she never let me include me properly with the girls and brought in her mother in between.
She kept her cool and acted stupid. In the morning I burnt the bread. She came down complaining about it. But she explained to me that no she actually said in front of the Ds that such things can happen. However, she had already made me look stupid. She remembers the second part but not the first. I told her that she does it a lot and that acting like she doesn't remember makes me annoyed.
I don't know. I told her how bad I feel about her taking the ring off, separating the beds and the money. She said I pushed for it and that she needed to save to be able to move out...
I am not sure if I should not believe half she said.
She said she hadn't had a hug for a long time. I said I hadn't as well.
It was like peeing to the wind but I just don't think I should leave the house.
. I don't know what more to do apart from focusing on the girls and carrying on. I was tearful at times both were but I felt awkward. For all the things I do I said you treat me bad and keep me away from the girls I bursted out.
Please let me know your thoughts
Me: 43, W: 43 M: 16, T: 18 D - 7, D - 7 ILUB: 26 August 2014 Still living together
