This is W and D's last week here. I'm really struggling as we get closer to next Saturday when she leaves for Arizona.
More relationship talk with W last night and this morning. She is a nervous wreck. She keeps complaining about hyperventilating and that she's having trouble breathing due to her anxiety. She's also very paranoid about me finding someone else. She told me this morning that she has been having dreams of me meeting someone new and it tears her apart.
She is also trying to convince me that her mother was never out to get me. I dont beleive that for a second and told her I have always swam against the current when it came to her mom. Her mother wants W all to herself so they can live like sisters and raise D.
I thought I was feeling stronger the last few weeks but it feels like I'm coming unglued. I won't break down and ask her to stay. But I am just heart broken that this happened.
I feel like I'm back to idealizing W and feeling like I'm a failure that I couldn't keep my family intact.
