I'm sorry you are feeling sad . I totally understand about the "anniversary days" as this past Friday was my wedding anniversary.
I know that it is easy for us to think about these anniversary days, and it puts us back to a place where we never want to be. I understand that feeling of wanting to sleep for the whole next year. Coly, there were days where I wished I would fall asleep and never wake up. I hate to say it, but I had several of those moments in the past 18 months. And when you let those emotions take over it is very hard to feel like you are going to make it through the day.
BUT .... I have somehow gotten to a place where I don't feel that away anymore and I am very thankful for that. It doesn't mean that I don't still have days where I cry and wonder why did this have to happen to me. But, I find myself not letting those thoughts occupy my mind for too long. I know that you feel sad right now, and I totally understand. But, you will see that you are going to get to a better place....give yourself some time and be gentle with yourself.
I really feel that coming to these boards, and having the support from everyone here helped me tremendously. I got a few 2x4s that were much needed and I finally started to take a hard look at myself and see what I could do to make myself and my sitch better. I also started thinking that this really was not about me, it was about H. He was the one who made the choice to do what he did, not me. Even though his choices put us in this horrible situation, it was up to me to decide if I wanted to stay in that place or not.
I remember Skyhigh telling me that I needed to stop obsessing about him and that I needed to focus more on me. Let me tell you that was REALLY hard for me to do. Like you, I had friends who would tell me things H was doing. I would hear that he was not doing well, or that he was out with "so and so" or he went and did "such and such" and while I thought it was helpful for me to learn those things, really it made things worse, because then I started analyzing all that information to death She also said that I was grieving and that grieving takes time. But that I would get through it, and so will you Coly. It may not seem like it right now, but you will.
I'm sure D looked absolutely stunning when she was all "made up" for the prom. I remember going to my prom.....gosh that was SO LONG AGO
. I totally understand about the "anniversary days" as this past Friday was my wedding anniversary. 
and I finally started to take a hard look at myself and see what I could do to make myself and my sitch better. I also started thinking that this really was not about me, it was about H. He was the one who made the choice to do what he did, not me. Even though his choices put us in this horrible situation, it was up to me to decide if I wanted to stay in that place or not. 
She also said that I was grieving and that grieving takes time. But that I would get through it, and so will you Coly. It may not seem like it right now, but you will. 
