I appreciate all of this input, it has been very helpful. I need to spend some time digesting it.
Are you sure you're not a psychiatrist?
Thank you again.
Actually I'm a lawyer (but a nice person!) I've read a ton of books on relationship issues, for obvious reasons. And posted & read here for a long long time.
And gotten counseling and had a good therapist and a great DB coach 10 years ago.
You tend to learn when you open your heart and mind to a new way.
If you are interested, there is a marriage retreat called "Retrovaille" that helps a lot of couples. But it is for couples, so we can't always get our spouse to go.
An individual workshop in Philadelphia called "Essential Experience" is super helpful for people who want personal growth/insight and for sure helps in all their r's. I know it was very profound for me.
Retreats and personal growth workshops CAN be more "efficient" than weekly therapy at times b/c you might make a breakthrough in therapy but then have to return to work or pick up the baby, etc.
Gets fragmented, whereas the workshops/retreats lead to action plans and change IF IF IF you keep at it.
You cannot change your life with one insight if there is no follow up. But that follow up and "Work" is needed for all our r's.
there is such a great pay off.
I loved my h very much for a very long time. I wish we had addressed his underlying issues 10 years ago, but we did not. He repeated the same behavior,
And here I am. We have to do the work. It's so worth it.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
