Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 10

[PsySara]

My weekends are for spending times with the wee ones. I try to get out with friends around once or twice a month. Given working full time and then having three small ones kind of makes my "me" time very limited. But that's okay, I enjoy my kids.

WH went out for a bike ride yesterday while I was at work. When he came home he was quiet and distracted. Rather than tiptoe around him and try to mind read I told him pointblank that he appeared distracted. He looked at me and said, "You think so?" I told him that I knew him fairly well and there was something heavy on his mind. Here's where the infidelity colors everything...my mind immediately went to affair stuff and if he had crossed a boundary again. He says, "I know I need to build trust so I am going to be honest about today." My heart was pounding so loud I could barely hear him. He continues, " I felt bad about going for such a long bike ride and so I rushed home so I wouldn't be too late. I was gong almost 100 mph and got pulled over and now I have a ticket for $300."

Honestly I almost laughed with relief. While I told him gently that I did not want him to drive that fast as he could get killed but that a ticket was no big deal. I fear I am not as detached as I thought if the thought of him crossing boundaries makes me so on edge. Today WH texted me, "Thinking of you :)" I was surprised as this is very out of character for him. I texted back to him to be careful while riding today and "Don't bring home any homeless bikes." He was laughing because he's been oogling pics online of Ducatis and Harleys and Indians. He texted back that I am lucky there isn't a bike rescue or we'd be in trouble.

When I got home we decided to take it easy tonight and took the kids to IHOP for dinner. The kids had a great time and a full belly. We got home and I did the bath/homework/bedtime routine. WH just took them to bed to lay next to them while they doze off. Where are we in relationship? I don't think of this as piecing but it's not the feeling of limbo either. Honestly I don't care what the stage of...whatever it is we're doing but I am relaxed and happy so, who cares?