Everyday that goes by I'm stronger. One of my friend asked me the following question:'what is your stronger point?'. At first I thought strength but I know I'm strong, then courage came to my mind and it is the strongest part of me.
As a teenager I had to stand up to my mum to achieve my dream (teaching in the UK) and for me it wasn't real strength but courage to stand up for what I believed. Recently I also realised that I have courage as I could have easily packed my bags and moved back to my home country when my marriage broke down and I didn't. I have courage because I'm now a single mother in a country which isn't my home country and with no family support. I have courage because I decided to deal with depression without the help of medication.
All of us here have courage as we carry on despite having being it by a bus. All of us have courage to believe that life has a lot much more to offer us (may it be with our spouse or not).
I had to have a laugh despite my tears when I signed my petition for my decree nisi. I am mourning my marriage not my ex-husband but it took him 4 days between the moment he received the petition and when he actually signed it. I couldn't stop laughing as he is he one who doesn't want to be part of my life and he knew that the petition was coming his way. It took me one day from the day to receive the paper to sign it and dropped it to solicitor. I'm ready to move on with my life.
What ex does now doesn't effect me. I know I will always love him but I know that my life is WAY much better, healthier and happier now. I know now that I'm courageous and worthy of so much more than ex was giving me. I am on another level and too far ahead of ex if he was ever to come back. He is still the same, I'm a better person (not comparing with him) but in a sense that I have dealt with all/ almost all of my issues and I feel at peace with myself. NOW I'M TRULY ME and I will never go back to who I was.
