You say often that you "wish you knew" better, but when we say "watch out for your old ways" you act as if you are being attacked, and you shut down. IMO that has to change b/c my guess is, that it plays out in the marriage as "when Wsh does not get his way, he punishes/withholds."
Actually, I rarely asked my wife for anything, to the point that I would sometimes say something like, "it must be nice to not have someone constantly on you for things". Me not wanting things from her was a big part of the problem. She felt like I didn't need her much, yet she needed me a lot.
M: 33, W: 30 @BD M 7, T 10 BD: Early Dec W left: Late Dec W got stuff: Late Jan W sent S papers: Mid Feb OM cnfrmd: Late Feb
Pain can yield tremendous growth OR everlasting sadness and bitterness.
