Still I totally get it! I wonder for myself if im better off where I am rather than getting a taste of having a partner only for it to be taken away again. I can imagine the pain and what you are now gong through and it scares the crap out of me. It's partly why I admire you and your ability to go so all in. I wish I could do that a bit more. Scheeeesch and some think I'm too desperate to have an R? The exact opposite may be true. I need to change that and be a little more like you!
Thanks for the admiration. But trust me, you don't want to be like me. To have the taste of a partner when you have been alone almost all of your adult life raising your kid on your own and having it taken away from you is goddawful. Especially when you really just meshed well with that partner. Don't be more like me.
It is natural to look to the future when you are with someone. But I was enjoying the building and present more than looking to the future. And that obviously needed to be done, according to why he left.
Thanks for all the support. I am in the acceptance phase. it is what it is now matter why or how and it can't be changed. So, forward I go.
Tonight I'm dragging mentally exhausted self to the gym after work then D9 has dance and I need to get some groceries and do something about the bomb that has went off at my house. I haven't had the energy to touch anything at home.
