Coly.....it sounds like you did a great job with the meeting with H. I hope you feel good about how you handled the situation and yourself
I know that after I saw H after not seeing for an extended period, I had this moment when I started to feel better about our sitch. I had put this idea in my head that he was off having this great, carefree, fun filled life without me.....when in reality that was the farthest thing from the truth.
All we can do is continue to move forward...one day at a time, and not be so hard on ourselves. Easier said then do I have learned that we (the LBS) have definitely made more progress in things then our partners have. We are learning to deal with things, even though it has been very difficult, and they are stuck in this pattern and don't want to get out of it.
I remember telling my H, "one day when you finally decide to take a good long look at who you have become, and what you have done, you will definitely not like what you see." He is just now starting that process and is not liking what he is seeing at all.
Be proud of how you are handling yourself, and how you are taking care of you and your D.
