Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 10

[PsySara]

Wow Sky, you hit the nail on the head. I think I jumped to "piecing" and it wasn't, it was me so desperate to keep him that I was willing to settle for whatever he would give. Not anymore.

Last night we talked for 3.5 hours. WH was awkward and kind of verbally stumbled saying he wasn't sure what to say but he wanted us to just talk. Color me shocked, this guy avoids relationship conversations since we first married. I told him point blank I had already spoken to a lawyer and there was no way to have a separation agreement in Florida, it was divorce or nothing. When I mentioned divorcing him so casually he looked a bit surprised. A few time she mentioned that we were just a bad match and I shouldn't try to twist myself into a pretzel for him. I told I wasn't anymore, that I had given up and had embraced a future without him. I told him I would be fine and looked forward to dressing up nice for someone else, that I was excited to find someone to show the new, improved Sara too.

WH was taken aback and said he felt I deserved better than him, I agreed. The tone changed and WH said we should take it one day at a time and see where it leads. I told him I was just moving forward and I just couldn't be bothered to try anymore. We then talked a lot about where we both went wrong in marriage. He started to criticize my personality and I shut that down. I told him he needed to clean up his own backyard. I told him I saw no real change in him and I was done trying to change myself. If he wasn't changing after all this mess then I was not motivated to try and work on myself to make him happy. Weirdly enough our conversation ended nicely.

This morning when WH woke he looked awful, he admitted to only getting about an hour of sleep. That was VERY weird as he has slept like a baby since this whole awful affair BD. Meanwhile I am usually the one losing sleep and tossing and turning. Last night I slept like the dead and had a great day at work. The saga continues.