Sooo, I'm a bit all over the place.

Child has been born (I know that).

I'm not going to say anything for the time being, until I work things out a bit in my head.

But at the moment, I just want to shout at him in caps that of course our M broke down irretrievably if he was off chasing other women.

I want to tell him in caps that there are no financial matters to sort out as the house if mine, so he can eff right off if that's what he's angling at.

I'm also thinking that I never, ever want to set eyes on him again.

And I'm also thinking that I'm not even going to bother answering.

I've got a crazy long day ahead of me tomorrow, 13 hours of work. I was starting to feel sleepy but now all I want to do is clean.

Weird thing is, I've never had that reaction to anything before in my life. But seriously, I want to get down on my knees and scrub the inside of the oven for all it's worth.

What's going on with me? I don't know if I've ever felt this angry.


Me: 48, XH: 42
T: 18 years, M: 15 years

EA/PA 1: 6/2012
EA/PA 2: from autumn 2012-present

BD: 5/2013
ILYBNILWY BD & left: 10/2015

OW conceived: 8/2016
Born: 4/2017

H filed: 7/2017
D final: 28/12/2017