Sellout, it's great that you're having positive interactions. Sometimes it's those little victories that help us keep going. That said, I'm going to echo the others and caution you against reading into things too deeply right now.
We all come here feeling like our situations are unique and others just don't really understand things like we do. While that is true, it's also true that human behavior is human behavior. When you have been around these boards for a while, you'll start to see the same patterns repeat over and over again. The individual details and circumstances differ, but our stories are much more alike than they are different. No one wants to discourage you. No one will be happier for you than this group of people if you reconcile your marriage. Others are just looking out for you and trying to share the wisdom of collective experiences.
Problems that lead to marital separation and threat of divorce do not develop overnight. They don't resolve overnight either. It's a marathon and not a sprint. If your W came to you tomorrow and said she wanted to reconcile, your DB journey wouldn't be over. The problems that led to this point still have to be addressed and repaired or else you'd just find yourself right back in this same position later. There are no quick fixes. Reconciliation is just the beginning of trying to work out your issues cooperatively. DBing is a lifelong journey--not just emergency resuscitation.
It is very, very common for spouses to act as yours is doing and for there to be a lot of back and forth. It's neither good nor bad. It's just the way these situations tend to play out. If you read others stories on the boards, you will see it over and over. It has been my personal experience too. Again, this is not to discourage you. This could very well be the first steps of her turning back towards the marriage. Or it just might be part of the process. That doesn't mean it won't eventually work out. But you are signing yourself up for a potentially rough road if you continue to micro analyze every little move she makes.
The reason everyone tells you to detach is so you aren't obsessing over every interaction and trying to find meaning that may or may not be there. We have all done it, but it makes you crazy. Your marriage saving energy can be put to use in better places. Detachment doesn't mean you stop caring about your W or give up on the marriage. But you can't control the outcome here. Your W is going to do what she wants to do. Your power and control lies within yourself. Don't waste your time trying to mindread and overanalyze her. That will not help you bring her back. Just continue putting your energy into becoming a better man and husband that she will WANT to come back to. You don't need to understand what she meant when she commented on your clothing or sent you a text in order to do that.
