I called out to you because I was desperate for you to tell me more about the parallels between my WH and yours. I was full of hope at the time.
Somehow his informing me he's started the process has changed things for me. I feel different inside. The hope has died. There's nothing left to protect me from the pain, the grief anymore.
I cried in front of my son for the first time since December. I hate that he saw me.
I know WH is experiencing some of the issues with OW that he experienced with me. Namely trust. I've guessed that he's given her his passwords to his email accounts, because I saw he deleted the email where I said I loved him, and then deleted it from his bin - he only would do that if he was worried she might see it. And he's been bcc-ing her into all emails he sends me.
I know intellectually things will get better. I just don't know how to hang on till then.
Can I just ask, Bluwave, how did the turn around for your WH happen? Were you starting to communicate in a friendly fashion? did you have R talks?
I ask but at the same time I despair because I know the answers will not be necessarily helpful, because my WH and yours, while outwardly similar, are very different people. I know my WH well enough to know that once he's made up his mind, that's it. His sitch with OW has to come to crashing point the way it did with me before he will leave her. Or she will have to dump him, and given that she's clinging on despite the number of huge lies he's already told her, it doesn't look like she will either.
