WW in PA: Threaten to tell kids? Confront OM?

[mvgfwd2]

I wouldn't tell your WW what you will do if she doesn't comply with your demand she leave the MBR or house. Talk is weak, actions are strong. You lay out your boundary "all contact with OM must stop as of now". If she doesn't you take action like just throw her stuff into another room and put a lock on the MBR door. Explain to her that you will not facilitate the A by paying for her devices she uses to communicate with OM then cut her off the phone service. She's a big girl she can get her own phone. You may want to think about separating finances to protect yourself. Your money if for the family and if she is in an A then she is not in your family. These are actions that you can control. You are not controlling her. She can do what she wants. But you are creating boundaries that she can willfully comply with or not. If she chooses to not comply you have to take an ACTION or the boundary and any other ones are a waste of time. So before laying out your boundaries think of the ACTION you will take if she doesn't comply. You only tell her the boundary not the ACTION you will take. If she says something like "and if I don't?" Just say "bad choices have consequences". Being too wordy if weak. Remember ACTIONS are strong, words are weak.