WW won't separate

[resolut]

Hi Sandi2 - thanks for your responses.

What if the affair continues for a couple of years, or longer? Will you still see no rush? If you won't stand up to her while in an active A, when will you?

I'm really not trying to get you to file for a D. I'm just saying that she will not see your strength while you quietly sit back and allow her to benefit from being M to you...and having an affair, too.

I am mostly waiting until the end of the school year to get starting on the D, telling the kids, etc. We're close enough now.

I'm on the tipping point of not believing the marriage can be saved.

And yes I get it about dropping the rope. It is one of those things that is easier said than done. I'm doing this piece-by-piece. It is hard to unwind 25+ years of devotion to a spouse even in the face of such bitter betrayal. I can see though it is what she deserves now.

I'm feeling good though. I seem to be over a lot of the grief at the moment. I know it will return when we're in the process of telling the kids, filing the D and moving her out but I'm resting on a plateau right now.