Forgot to discuss my W childhood. He parents never married. Father was neglectful, even though they have a good relationship now(they tale pretty much every day). He mother very abusive and was known to sleep around, especially with people's husbands. Seems to be a generational family curse. My W was the exception who managed to stay a virgin until meeting myself. For her sex without love made no sense. Now her views have seemed to completely change, since the cruise. Hearing her talk now is like listening to MIL and I hate it. Because my MIL is trifling.
I am 36 and W is 33. Her period were always sporadic over the years, last year it just got bad. So in November the doctor gave her hormone pill and it finally set everything straight like a day prior to the cruise. I was very excited and looking forward to my W returning. But apparently she made up for lost time with somebody else...smh
As far as the peck she said claimed to have with the first guy in July. I'm sure it was a little more kissing than that. As for the guy she claimed to have just kissed at his home. I believe there was probably some kissing and groping. And she likely stopped things before it went too far, judging from the text to her friend.
Both her parents are flirts and she is one as well. I've never had an issue with it, because its never happened in front of me. And there was never any signs of phone numbers changing hands or anything. Prior to this, she was heavily against this type of behavior. Now she has thrown her morals out the window. Lately she has been acting like an entitled teenager and her best friend caught it as well. Which is why he and his wife have decided to have nothing to do with her. When I read her explanation of the WW, it matched damn near perfectly with W change of behavior.
At the moment, I feel that she likes the attention from text, FB and IG from other men. But is currently messing with no one I believe, because the obsession/fantasy is with OM who lives in VA. There seems to be a loyalty towards him, even though he clearly has no loyalty towards her. Based on when his W finds out, he has disappeared and cut contact twice already. But when I question my W when catching her, I get nothing but defiance.
Boundaries is where I'm stuck. Not sure what the consequences should be at this point. Like I said before she didn't give a damn. Now that she is getting the changes she always wanted. W might actually care about the boundaries I set. But I need example of consequences, because I honestly can't think of any other than putting her out. And I believe that's where PEW and myself are stuck at.
Currently I'm at the part of DR where Carol is changing for her husband who is unwilling to give up OW. So Carol put that on the back burner at the moment. I just assumed that was the place, I'm at currently. What she has seen in me is change. But also when I get fed up, I block what her and other OM are doing. I have contacted OMW twice already. And by doing so the A has stopped. The first time was a month and a half. And the second time they removed each other from FB and IG. Though they probably still contact each other via messenger now probably. So she knows I won't take it, but I have no real options with consequences. Its not as if I'm dealing with my child. Even though W behavior matches that of one.
