Same Sitch. New Approach... Feeling Good (part 2)

[Chris73]

Just got back from my weekend at the beach running an 8K. It was really fun and being able to see my kids cheer me on at the beginning of the race was so inspiring. It kept me going! My parents came to help with the kids. Now that they know the sitch they're very supportive and helpful.

The weekend also featured a very interesting exchange with my W. My normal behavior would have been to send her txts and pics before, during, and after the race to let her know how I did. This time I didn't. By 9am (15 minutes after the race was over) she called me asking how I did. I spoke to her for only about a minute and then said, "I've gotta go. I'm trying to round up the kids and get to breakfast. I'll have them call you a little later to say hello." After that her tone completely changed. She sounded disappointed and cold. It was obvious that she was expecting me to tell her much more about the weekend and the race. The kids eventually called her back, but I didn't talk to her again. Total 180 on my part.

I suppose this is what detaching feels like. My fear in doing something like this earlier in the crisis was that I would be contributing to widening the gap between us. These days, it's hard to believe the gap could get any wider! So now I'm making more decisions with my best interests at heart.

Interesting side-note...

Yesterday we arrived home from the beach before my W came home from wherever she went. The house was exactly how we left it on Saturday. Her bed hadn't been slept in. I doubt she ever came home Saturday night. At the very least I'm glad she has enough respect for me to do whatever she's doing these days outside the house.