Oh - and you take that story with a HUGE grain of salt if it's being told by the WAS.
Don't get me wrong - there ARE bad spouses out there. But more often than not, a couple is caught in a downward spiral of each not feeling like their needs are being met, then withholding from the other.
Absolutely, the answer isn't cheating. If you really tried everything ad nothing is happening and you need to leave for your own sanity, you leave.
My point is you have two violations of the vows. I think it's a matter of perception of which is "worse" But the cheater will always be branded as the biggest wrongdoer. Then you have someone who checked out of the marriage, maybe not through infidelity, but only decides to shape up when the other spouse is out the door and this person is the poor person who was cheated on and "doesn't want the divorce" and the cheater is portrayed as the root of all evil.
It's just 2 huge wrongs in my opinion, but that cheating always seems to wash away the neglectful spouses wrongdoings.
