3.5 Months of Pain - Fork in the Road

[resolut]

I'll share a little bit from my situation which has some similarities. When my wife gave me the ILYBINILWY talk she told that I've always been distant from her, never saw her for who she really is, etc. and then asked for space in our marriage to figure things out.

At the time I didn't realize that space meant she wanted to pursue an active A with the OM. This is because I had not discovered it at the time.

It took me a long time to realize that it is too late for me to try and save the marriage by being the person she was asking for before the A. The natural instinct is to try and be that now and compete with AP. It took me time to realize and accept this.

So now I'm only focused on my children and loving them and becoming a much better version of myself than I ever was, GAL and finding goodness in God. My wife has hurt me badly but it now feels better to know that I am moving on to a better place and not wasting my time thinking she'll snap out of it if only I can be better towards her right now. This all took time and I made so many mistakes and probably still will.