The way I am detaching is I don't ignore her, I just don't initiate contact and do my own thing. When she texts me or calls me I am always attentive to what she says and respond to her accordingly. I don't linger on phone calls so when she is done really talking I am the first one to say good bye politely and I will talk to you later. I feel there are ways of going about this without ignoring them. My W feels that I ignored her in the past too so I do not want to continue behavior that will remind her of the past. I just want her to realize that I have a life too and that she can be a part of it whenever she wants to be included. I hope that makes sense. I have only been practicing these DB principles for the past 7 weeks so there are many veteran posters that could probably give better advice. I just don't agree that these principles are a one size fits all and I tweak them to what feels right in my situation but in no way am I an expert on this.
