MLC Affair or Exit Affair??

[strdays]

I have convinced my WAW to write a statement of admission of adultery. I am convinced she is having a MLC and to be honest I don't know if I really want the divorce or not.

Truth is I cannot deal with her affair with a 24yrs old man, I don't know if I can ever recover from that even if she will come back.

We are physically separated since last November and she claim she is in love with OM.

Now I am driving divorce car it seems, although it was her to call it over 6 months ago( at the time I suspected affair but not confirmed yet)

So should I serve divorce or what?