Ok 25, I know you and Vanilla and some others don't like labels, but this guy is screaming from the high hilltops that he is NPD. He quit his dream job to screw you over in your divorce? He wants you to be evaluated? He is telling you what you need to do and where you need to move? This is textbook stuff. This is precisely why I have not filed for D. There is no wrath like the wrath of a narcissist pissed that someone is daring to move on from them. If I'm right and he is a befuddled as you say, this relationship will not last long (mine kept an on/off for 3 years when hidden, in the light of day it lasted less than 2 months).
As a lawyer you know that his un/under employment is a croc that you can challenge it. He is giving you lots of reasons to let go. You have the support of your kids, your intelligence, your compassion, and your drive. You will rise above this and flourish.
