KGirl - new life, new stuff #2

[KGirl]

Hi Maybell!

Yeah, I tend to fluctuate/struggle between "maybe I shouldn't hang my hat on what I think is ideal.. maybe I should step outside my comfort zone and maybe some things aren't really dealbreakers.. there's only so many guys and I can't be that picky" vs. "I'm not being too picky, I just know what I want and settling never ends well." Not sure how to balance that quite yet, I guess. I do think I have a habit of chasing after the lost puppies/wanting to try to help or fix someone and following those leads (but telling myself it's "giving someone a chance and keeping an open mind") rather than people who are emotionally available/ready for a relationship. How else did I manage to 1) find someone who had never been in a relationship with someone in real life, 2) find someone whose ex-girlfriend wasn't even moved out yet, 3) find someone who was still getting divorced and telling me how I was so much nicer to him than his ex-wife and my main virtue was that I "didn't yell at him"? Apparently I'm not good at identifying this problematic issues or am willing to overlook them, and I'm not sure what that says about my availability, either.

I hear that about how things aren't all sunshine and unicorns. I feel like I am willing to do the work and I know things are hard and won't always be perfect. But somehow I keep getting involved with people who run or give up the first time something gets hard (or just decide they "aren't feeling it") and then I get frustrated that I was willing to put in the work and they were not. I'm not religious but hopefully I can generally have faith/trust that eventually it will work out. I mean, statistically speaking, most people who are looking for marriage find it eventually, right? :S I do have some older coworkers that are not but they have intentionally chosen that and aren't interested in relationships at this point.