I do believe that people do get to a point where it's just easier to detach and leave the MLCers to their own drama. When I was going through this, I got to the point that I actually wished he were dead because he was like a bad penny, i.e., popping up when I least expected it, spewing and angry all of the time.
I know exactly what you are saying and trust me, sometimes it's best not to have anything to deal w/them, much less talk to them. Have you visited HaWho's threads? You might want to go back and read her earlier ones because her h has issues with the food she cooks and still does. You might find some valuable info in her threads that could help you.
Just remember...it's not you...it's him.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
