Tread...the affair is the symptom of the issues within your marriage. Since your W is unwilling to put much effort into the relationship, it will be up to you to lead the way.

You said neglect is/was part of the problem in your marriage. Can you provide us with more information on the other parts of the problems? Then we might be better equipped to help.

Have you read DR? The links Cadet has provided?

Me:45 ExW:48
M:04/97
3 Bombs & 2 ReCons
1st BD 11/10
D Finalized 4/20
D-16 S-14
Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa