So Confused and Conflicted (7)

[Vanilla]

Wsh

It is not ok for you to be treated this way by your WW. It isn't no matter what you think your failings are.

You have been hurt and as a modest shy man that hits at self esteem. Truly it does. You seem to me to be an ordinary H, with ordinary needs and requiring a faithful W.

WW could have taken a different course, could have resolved some issues with you. All sorts of choices. Her behaviour was her choice and is her responsibility.

It is rotten and you deserve better.

I always think that when an LBS is as down as you are then there is likely some trauma behind it. A reason, a source for those feelings and thoughts, some compounded damage, possibly from childhood. Before you go digging deeply into the changes to make, I suggest some extreme self care, some tenderness, some compassion for yourself. I want to say, ok you had some choices, possibly some poor ones. You didn't cheat or lie or treat your WW with disrespect as she treated you. I want to say this is not ok. I want to say that survival is important that you are important. That what you think and feel is important. I want to say that I believe you and am sending you some strength for today, for those moments when it's unbearable.

I want to say those things to you, so I am saying them. I am saying it's ok to go at your own pace and feel what you feel.

Hugs

V