Last night I made a nice dinner for D9 and FF. Prime rib. Dessert. Nice wine, the whole 9. We hid eggs outside for D( when she went to bed. FF stayed over.
Today, actual Easter hasn't been all that great. I am disagreeing with my BFF. Easter is always a trigger because ex lef the week before and it was her one first holiday I didn't get to spend with her. She's gone with him. FF left right before he came to get her.
I tried my hardest not to be affected by the fact he did not invite me to Easter. But I ooulnd't I was hurt. And I spent a lot of time crying. I told him how I felt. I did exactly what you suggested before I even read it. I opened up the dialogue just as you described.
I was really upset. He is texting me, telling me about it. But I am home alone. And that hurts horribly. I was advied by IC not to say anything because it was so new She said maybe he wasn't ready. So I tried working on not being upset, but it didn't work I couldn't stop crying (something that hasn't changed in 9 years on any holiday since bomb drop)
So I told him I was hurt he didn't invite me. However, I understand it might be too soon and he wasn't ready. I told him it was a "me" problem and I was dealing with it. I had told him how easter is rough given the gabby circumstanes. ANd he says something dumb, as some guys often do, to the effect of " oh, o you wanted to come so you had something to do on a holduat that was hard for you?" I told him he should know me better than that and it was because I wanted to spend it with him and meet his family and no other reason. He said "oh, ok, I gotcha." He apparently said he understood but offered no apologies.
I am hurt. Not going to lie. I can't really even talk to him today, although there was no "sorry, I didn't know you felt that way, I would have invited you".
We had s short communication a few minutes ago and he said he would talk to me soon. I don't know that I am in a place to do so.
It's funny, I have a fear of being upset or disagreeing with people. Like I must be wrong for having the feelings I do. I fee that way about my BFF right now although I just seriously feel that way. Same for FF. They are my feelings, I am dealing with them on my own. Not dragging either one into them.
My therapist knew I would be upset about this. She urged me to deal with this in a way that I didn't erase all of the good between us.
I am not erasing the good. But nonetheless I am hurt. ANd I don't know right now how much he gives a crap. I guess we shall see.
