So Confused and Conflicted (7)

[25yearsmlc]

I'm not sure how to say this. I wish you could see that your comments about how you missed her signals but that's not really your fault b/c she should have made it clearer OR you are simply not experienced enough to know..

but you admit you put her desires and their intensity into an equation, weighing whether it was worth it to you to do it, even if she repeatedly made those desires known.

Then that seems to lead you to saying how she should have done something differently or made something clearer. And or that women should be clearer but...

When women (and some men) tell you that what you're saying is that you'd pretty much only do things for her if you thought you might lose her otherwise, or if it wasn't very important to you, and it's her fault or the lack of clarity in the female gender, you don't seem to hear what we hear.

I'm not saying you were a jerk h. I'm saying that you still seem to be, effectively blaming her or her being a woman, for the way you treated her.

And I cannot see how that helps you now.

Plus, you said you want to learn from this. That makes sense. So how will you be different in your next r?

I worry that you will say you'll "check in more often" with them about their happiness quotients.

What about learning how to read them, without quantifying their satisfaction?

Just a question.