First time here part 2

[PsySara]

Hey Leah,
I find my resentment and anger starts to rise mostly when WH throws me crumbs and I have to keep from gobbling them up. IT ironic, when he's cold and mean I think of all the DBing strategies to "win" him back but when he softens I get filled with rage. My fantasy is to be faced with a devastated and remorseful H that has some sort of light bulb moment about the destruction he has wrought. However expectations breeds resentment, right. So I have to fund a way to detach and stop hinging my emotions on how he treats me. This has been an epic struggle as my fear of raising my children in split custody shadows me constantly.

So, like you, I need to work on finding peace within myself. I need to focus on what small changes I can make on myself to be more secure. I also need to cut myself some slack and let myself process my grief, my pain and even my anger. Am I hitting any nails?