I still call BS on him. All of this points to lying and cheating, and especially now trying to fish for what you may know. Trust your gut--it knows the truth! Trust yourself always. And shame on his boss for getting involved--that is very unprofessional--glad you ignored him.
I'm glad you're setting strong boundaries; you do not have to tolerate his lying, drinking, and staying out all night. I honestly don't care what he has against you right now and how he wants to justify this. What matters most are the kids, your health, and preparing for this baby. So even if there is no OW, his priorities are whack and his behavior is deplorable. Leave him be, he has to live with his choices. Don't give him any reasons to aim fire at you! Rise above him.
So what little things can you do each day to feel better? Are there little things that help you focus on kids and not him and his actions? A daily warm bath, takeout, more ice cream, pampering day, a new outfit for after birth, haircut, etc, because it's easier to manage than just telling yourself to detach/GAL, etc, as that can be overwhelming. Those little things do add up and feel good!
It seems like there are a lot of M/R talks still and I just can't see how that helps anything--I think it's giving him an outlet to justify his crap behavior. What if you just put your hand up and said "Please stop, we both know what's going on and there is no point in discussing it every day. You already know where I stand on all of this." Exit room/end call. Let him stew in it.
I think you get better results and feel better when you stay away from him. Do you have another support system lined up for the birth? I want you to know you have help, love, and people that you can rely on that day.
I still think it may be worth while to hire a PI and confirm there is OW. That way you have that taken care of and if you want separation or D down the road, you at least have the confirmation. Maybe your dad would help arrange or pay? He seems to have your back. Then you dont have to worry/wonder--hire, pay the person, and dust your hands of that fear for right now.
GIANT Hugs, Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
