She had a fight with OM and it scared her that she might lose both of you.
Remove yourself from the equation. Until OM is completely and totally out of her life (and she can prove it), back away.
Think of your wife as an addict. She is addicted to drugs (OM). Before she can come to her senses, she needs to quit her drug and abstain from it for a period of time until the cravings go away.
Also... always look at her actions and not her words.
